Happy Friday, y’all. I know that many of you are celebrating Christmas today, and I have no complaints about that. Meanwhile, I want to recognize the many, many people who are not celebrating Christmas. As I scrolled through my insta feed this morning I saw picture after picture of folks in matching pyjamas, lovely smiles on their faces, puppies and kiddos galore.

They were sweet pictures, but I couldn’t help thinking about the people I know who are not celebrating. I’ll give you a moment – no, 30 seconds to join me – just pause and reflect on why someone might not celebrate Christmas.

What’s on your list? Here’s what I came up with:

Too far from family

Follow another religious path

Financial reasons

Estranged from family

Raging against capitalism

Isolated in some way

Are not religious at all

Once again, I am in no way saying that people who ARE celebrating need to censor themselves. I just want to say for those of you NOT celebrating Christmas, you are not alone. I’m not celebrating Christmas today. I’m celebrating that it’s Friday. Finally.

According to the Pew Research Center, the CIA (yes, that CIA) and the Encyclopedia Britannica, Christians make up about a third of the world’s population. That’s a broad definition, including around 41,000 Christian denominations.

ID: Shows a table with world religions on it, Buddhists, 488 million, 7.1 % of world population; Christians, 2.2 billion, 31.4% of world pop; Hindus, 1 billion, 15% of world pop; Jews, 13.9 million, 0.2% of world pop; Muslims, 1.6 billion, 23.2% of … — ID: Shows a table with world religions on it, Buddhists, 488 million, 7.1 % of world population; Christians, 2.2 billion, 31.4% of world pop; Hindus, 1 billion, 15% of world pop; Jews, 13.9 million, 0.2% of world pop; Muslims, 1.6 billion, 23.2% of world pop; Unaffiliated 1.1 billion, 16.4% of world pop; Folk religions, 405 million, 5.9% of world pop; Other religions, 58.2 million, 0.8% of world population.

As you can see, there is plenty of diversity in the world. All those pictures, though, can feel like a lot of pressure. We might look at those pictures and feel like we are failing, or like our families are. It’s easy to imagine that all those smiling faces are direct results of super happy lives. I mean, insta and facebook are all about putting your best pic forward, right? Feeds are carefully curated to paint a picture for the world to see – a nice, happy picture. And one that fits within the white Christian privilege paradigm. But the world - even the United States - is much more complex than that.

ID: My sister, father, mother and me. We’re all smiling. My hair is frizzy and wild. My dad is in his sweater he pulled on over his pjs.

Months before my father passed away, I was home on a visit from Minnesota. The night before I flew out, my sister came in to the room a bit frantically, and told us we had to get together for a picture, that she needed it while I was still home, so it had to be right now. It was past 11 pm, my father was not feeling well, we were all in comfy pyjamas, and none of us really wanted to do it. She persisted, though, and so we did. In that moment, none of us was very happy about it, not even my sister who was by then exasperated with all of us. Later she sent me an etched charm with that picture on it. We look happy in that picture, and I’m glad to have it, but I also know the complexity behind that picture.

Picture shows Maite the Rottweiler’s face up close, with a word bubble that says, Happy Friday!

Again, I’m not saying that people need to keep their pictures to themselves (here I’ve shared a picture of my dog, which I think is adorable). I am suggesting that when we are looking through our feed that we keep in mind that every picture is not necessarily the whole picture, that sometimes people post pictures as they try to be in that happy moment. I am suggesting that we see all those smiling faces as hopes and aspirations, as possibilities. I am saying if you know someone has been struggling, reach out. Even if they have a happy, smiling picture. I’m saying if you are struggling, reach out. Even if you worry about interrupting someone’s “perfect” holiday. I am saying if you don’t have the perfect picture, I am here for that. I am saying that you don’t even need to post a picture.

(banner photo shows Maite laying in her (MY) bean bag)